


Nobody Wins

by natacup82



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Gen, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-11
Updated: 2012-12-11
Packaged: 2017-11-20 22:17:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/590242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/natacup82/pseuds/natacup82
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fiona character study; Monica has left again and this is Fiona as she slowly gives up what's left of her childhood.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nobody Wins

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hauntedd](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hauntedd/gifts).



> This wasn't the fic or fandom I intended to write for you but reading your prompts this is what I kept coming back to. Inspired, at least in part, by [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i_BPiM8syiQ). I hope you enjoy it.

Fiona’s mom has been taking off for as long as she can remember. Sometimes it’s a couple of days and other times it’s a couple of weeks but she always comes home.

When Fiona is sixteen she does it again and Fiona doesn’t even bat an eye. Fiona and Lip know how to handle this shit until she shows back up trying to be the perfect mom. The younger kids will learn how to deal with it eventually and in nine months she’ll probably bring another Gallagher into the world. That’s how they got Ian. And Debbie. And Carl.

They’ve been here before.

Frank will call Monica a psycho bitch and move into whatever bar hasn’t barred him for lapsing on his tab and Fiona will get herself and the other kids fed and to school until she decides to show up again.

It’s shitty but they’re Gallagher’s so they’re used to it.

*

Things are normal, at least their version of normal, for a couple of weeks. Fiona gets herself and the kids to school but misses track practice every other day picking up Carl from whoever they’ve talked into watching him. He’s been kicked out of his pre-school for biting so they’ve been shifting him from person to person until they can find a new one to take him. As long as someone will take him Fiona doesn’t have to miss school.

Frank is useless; he doesn’t help with the kids or with the food or anything, he just keeps yelling about Monica being a crazy bitch who doesn’t deserve him. Usually this would be the time that Monica would come home, ready to spoil them all and make up with Frank making Fiona cross her fingers that they don’t end up with another baby brother or sister in nine months. But she doesn’t come home then.

And she doesn’t come home. And she doesn’t come home. And then Debbie is sent home sick with chicken pox and Fiona has to ditch school for a week to take care of her because the most Frank will do is pass out on the kitchen floor.

Fiona tells her track coach, “My mom’s out of town and my little sister is sick so I have to stay home and take care of her,” and she means it. She doesn’t expect to miss more than a week and a half before Monica finally comes home to take over dealing with Frank and the littler kids.

It’s just a week. Fiona can miss a week of school and not fall too far behind.

*

Monica doesn’t come back in a week.

Debbie’s back at school, the electric bill is due soon and Frank isn’t even pretending like he’s going to pay the bill. And Monica is nowhere to be found.

Fiona spends a night sitting on the floor in her room, back against the door to keep the kids out, crying and stressed and scared about what they’re going to do.

She goes to McDonald’s the next day after school and gets a job. Something she can work after school until Monica decides to show up and get Frank to pay bills again. It’s not enough hours to do much but it’ll help for this month at least. Still, she has to sacrifice something to make the time and running track isn’t doing anything to help her family survive.

Fiona quits track for the year, promises to try out again the next year and goes to work. It’s the first thing she has to give up, but she hopes it’s the last.

It’s not.

*

Three more weeks pass and Monica still isn’t back, Frank hasn’t done anything to help, he can’t even be counted on to buy milk and cereal for the kids and Fiona isn’t sure what to do.

She’s at work after school when a friend says, “My sister works down at the Motel 6, they’re hiring for morning shift cleaners if you’re interested.”

Fiona doesn’t give herself time to think twice, she says, “Yeah, absolutely. Give me her number.”

A week later Fiona has a second job cleaning hotel rooms. It’s between 7 and 10 in the morning and makes it pretty much impossible for Fiona to make any of her morning classes. So she stops going.

Fiona tells herself that she’s only missing English, American History and gym so it’s not that big of a deal. She keeps repeating it over and over again in her head hoping maybe if she says it enough eventually it’ll be true.

*

They manage to get through Thanksgiving okay. Fiona shakes Frank down every night for three weeks to get enough money to pay for the food and stay on top of the bills. She picks up shifts and skips more classes and somehow they make it work.

It’s good, the kids are happy and that’s what really matters.

But Monica still isn’t back.

It’s been three months, Fiona is failing four classes, she can’t remember the last time she ran and Monica is _still_ not back.

This time Fiona doesn’t think she’s coming back. She can’t keep kidding herself that it’s only for a few more weeks, that things are going to get better as soon as mom is back. It’s not. And it wasn’t great when Monica was around and pretending that her coming back will fix everything is just stupid.

They can’t keep surviving off two part time jobs and shaking Frank for change. Something has got to give and the only thing left is her.

Fiona drops out of school that Monday and starts her third job on Thursday.

*

Fiona stays up late one night, spreads all of the bills out on the kitchen table and starts counting out money. She’s got maybe enough to cover groceries and the electric bill. But that leaves the heat and the water if they give up the phone.

She hears footsteps on the stairs and Lip pokes his head down. “Why are you still up? We got school tomorrow.”

“Bills.” Fiona says gesturing toward the pile on the table. “If we wanna eat and shower I think I have to get another job.” She doesn’t bother saying anything about dropping out. He doesn’t need to know yet.

Lip starts sorting through the pile, counting out what they need for the month. He looks at her, and says, “I’ve got a little bit of money saved from tutoring. I can help.”

“You don’t need to do that, I’m handling it,” Fiona says, looking back at the pile.

Lip snorts, “And I can help you handle it. This is my family too; you don’t have to do this alone you know.”

Fiona smiles, not really happy but maybe a little less sad for a minute. “I know, I know,” she says, and then, “I’m pretty sure mom isn’t coming back this time.”

“Good, maybe the other kids won’t learn how to be disappointed in her. And if Frank wants to disappear we’ll be free of all the dead weight.”

Fiona laughs, “God, don’t say shit like that. He’ll probably start doing all his drinking at home.”

Lip snorts and then starts giggling, “We don’t keep enough beer in the house for that, thank god.”

He takes a couple breathes, gets his laughing under control and says, “Seriously Fi, you and me. We’re in this together, okay?”

“Yeah okay,” Fiona says and it’s not perfect but at least now she’s not in this alone and that’s something.

THE END


End file.
